5 Tips to Make Divorce Mediation Work for You

Divorce can bring up all kinds of feelings, it’s a difficult and emotional time. While you may be able to work through the settlement process on your own, it can be extremely stressful. A divorce mediator can help guide you through this trying time – but how exactly does divorce mediation make the process easier, and how does it work? 

There are many different terms used to refer to divorce mediation, including: collaborative law divorce, collaborative law, and marriage mediation. The goal of a divorce mediator is to help the spouses respectfully negotiate an agreement about your children, property and debt. A divorce mediator is neutral, works with both spouses and assists them in coming up with a specific plan for their separation or divorce that meets their unique needs.

Divorce is never easy but there are things you can do to help the process, listed below are some tips to consider when working your way through the emotional process of a divorce.

Be Open Minded

At some point during the mediation process you or your spouse will have to negotiate with the other spouse about dividing marital assets and liabilities. During this process, you may feel some resistance to conceding certain assets or agreeing to pay a particular amount. Remember, negotiations are an opportunity for both spouses to tell their individual stories about how each asset was acquired and why each spouse believes he or she deserves it in the divorce settlement. Don’t take such negotiations personally. 

Avoid High Conflict During The Divorce Process

You can help yourself to have a far less stressful divorce by keeping a calm and respectful attitude. Your spouse will notice the positive effort you put into mediation and hopefully will be inspired to put in the same understanding and open-mind that you have. Compromising with your spouse on one issue may encourage them to take more of your interests into account, this can also help to expedite the mediation process.

Determine If Mediation Is Right For You

Although mediation can be a very comfortable place for you and your spouse to communicate about all of the issues surrounding your divorce, there are a few things to consider. Mediation is not right for everyone and you will have to determine if you are most comfortable as the one-half of a couple mediating with your spouse or if you are more at peace when you have an attorney “representing” you in the mediation sessions.

Do Your Homework

When going into a mediation session, you will need to prepare. It is a good idea to get an estimate of your property and assets value from several experts. Do your homework and gather all information concerning your case if you want the best outcome. Formulate a list of questions you want to ask during the session so that you are going into it in a proactive manner.

Be Prepared For An Emotional Battle

No matter how well you and your spouse agree on issues, divorce is an emotional process. The more you can be prepared for this, the better. You’re about to go through a lot of challenging things, so get into the right mindset and learn some techniques to calm yourself down when emotions are running high.

Divorce mediation does not mean that you do not need a divorce lawyer, but it is a valuable tool in resolving marital issues, especially after the separation. If both parties are open to the resolution process, third-party mediation can be a powerful tool in reaching a fair and reasonable agreement. It may also have saved you and your soon to be ex-spouse the stress of proceeding through the legal system.

Divorce can be arduous and frustrating (not to mention expensive and emotionally draining). Do everything you can to be prepared and open-minded and prepared and then trust the process and the professionals to help you through it.