Can Separation Be Good For A Marriage?

A Blog About The Potential Benefits To An Extended Separation In A Marriage

Trying A Separation To Save Your Marriage

If you’re considering a separation from your spouse in Alberta, or if you’re currently in the process of separating, you may be wondering if having a temporary separation could strengthen your marriage.

The idea of a separation in a marriage can seem absolutely appalling. Not only is it an emotionally charged word, but the thought of spending any amount of time without your partner can be scary. If you’re thinking about getting a divorce, you might want to consider the potential upsides to trying out an extended separation.

The idea is that even though you are no longer living together, you are still holding each other accountable to complete necessary tasks before you are actually divorced.

What Is A Successful Separation?

Being separated is not the end of the relationship. A lot of couples think that after they separate they are now separate entities, but this is not true. There should be a clear arrangement during the separation process about what happens to the assets, and debts during a separation.

Each person must clearly understand what their responsibilities are once they separate. There should be equal sharing of resources and obligations, and the care of any children should be a top priority.

How Do You Get Third-Party Support For A Separation?

What happens if you separate from your spouse? And what options do you have if you are unable to reach an agreement with your spouse on how to divide your property, debts, and any other financial matters? Or, what happens if your spouse refuses to sign a separation agreement?

You can always try mediation or settlement conferences to help deal with your separation in Alberta. Or, you could draft a separation agreement and then ask the court to enforce it as an order of the court for yourself and/or your family. To request this, you would need to go before a judge of the court and present the case for your agreement.

Do You Have To Live Apart When You Separate in Alberta?

A common question once people have begun living separate lives is “Do I have to move out of the house?” Both adult members of a separating couple usually have right to live in the family home. Unless there are other circumstances that apply, both parties are entitled to continue living in the home unless there are Court orders that say otherwise.

Maintain Regular Communication

If you and your spouse decide to separate, communication becomes crucial. Communication is the way you will discover where you stand, what you want and need, and how to avoid disputes that can tear your marriage apart. Below are some tips about communicating with your spouse while separated:

  1. Talk about the less sensitive issues first;
  2. Use email or texting to communicate rather than speaking on the phone (this gives you each a chance to think about your reactions to a topic);
  3. Pay attention to how you feel during the conversation (if your spouse’s tone is becoming disrespectful, try not to take it as a criticism of you as a person but as a product of their emotional state); and
  4. Be willing to apologize and admit you’re wrong – it does not make you look weak – it makes you look like a mature adult capable of making.

The Separation Takeaway

It is possible to separate in Alberta and to create a separation agreement without a lawyer (although it is advisable in the least that you speak with a mediator). The success of any separation depends on the reasons and the agreements made before you separate. A structured plan and ongoing communication can help