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When Should You Not Use Divorce Mediation?

What is the best way to handle the divorce process? “Should I get an attorney”, or “should we try to find divorce mediation in Calgary”? These are questions that many people ask during a divorce. While choosing between the two may seem like a simple decision, each option comes with its own set of pros and cons that could mean the difference between a successful divorce or one full of problems.

Divorce mediation is appealing to many because it promises a collaborative process that leaves both spouses equally satisfied. It also saves you the emotional and financial strain of fighting it out in front of lawyers and a judge. However, there are times when divorce mediation won’t work, no matter how much you try to force the issue.

When deciding how to handle your divorce, you must take many factors into account. If your divorce is causing stress or conflict between you and your ex-spouse, it may be best to look into some divorce lawyers in Calgary.

Read below for a list of common reasons as to why divorce mediation may not be the right choice for you and your spouse:

1. Anyone Dealing With Anger Should Consider Seeing A Therapist Before Trying Mediation

If you or your spouse are dealing with anger issues, it is recommended that you see a therapist prior to trying divorce mediation. After all, how can you be expected to handle an anger issue during the mediation process?

Not only may your anger at your soon-to-be-ex as well as your children’s anger at both of you lead to an angry divorce; it could potentially ruin the mediation process as well. Many mediators will not move forward with a client who cannot control their emotions enough to conduct themselves in a reasonable manner.

2. If You’re Hoping For Reconciliation And Your Spouse Isn’t, Mediation Won’t Work

if you’re considering divorce mediation, be aware that it’s not recommendable in cases of severe conflict. Particularly if your spouse is unwilling to seek mediation to try to save the marriage. Meaning, if one party isn’t willing to participate in divorce mediation, it won’t lead to a reconciliation.

3. Most Mediators Won’t Proceed If You Are Not Ready To Cooperate—Yet Another Sign To Stop The Process

If you have decided to try divorce mediation in Calgary because you realize that this is your best chance at an affordable and peaceful solution to the problems in your marriage, be aware that most mediators will not proceed if one or both parties are non-cooperative.

The reason for this is that in most instances, the parties need to be cooperating with one another. In addition, they need to be willing to work towards an amicable divorce. If you aren’t willing to do both of these things, then you are wasting your time and money on a family mediator who says they will be able to divvy up all of your assets, separate your debts, define visitation and custody, and last but not least—settles child support.

The Takeaway

If you and your spouse are split when it comes to how you should go about obtaining a divorce, the divorce mediation process could be very beneficial for you. Mediators can keep both sides calm and level-headed. However, sometimes you may wish to go a different route. This is especially true if you and your spouse do not agree on any financial issues or spousal arrangements. In this situation, it may be best to hire an attorney to help you with the divorce process.